struggles

hidden within us all are secrets

secrets that can be revealed

secrets that cause trouble

and secrets that can stop it

but rumors are bigger than secrets

we thought secrets were hurtful,

rumors top it.

they're anywhere, everywhere

you can imagine

your "friends" talk crap

and start drama in your life

your "friends" start fights

and fill your mind with strife.

your homies become your enemies

and then your left alone

and eventually your words turn into fists

but after the fact you'll realize the fights

are never worth it

we can argue, we can fuss

we can say that we dont care

but in the end "hate" is just a word

and bruises aren't the most painful things

in the world.

secrets turn to rumors;

rumors turn to arguments

and then into fists

you thought the fight was won

when really....

that was the last battle punch

the war has just begun

Living your purpose

You know, this last year I had a strange revelation.

You do know what a revelation is right?

"The act of revealing or disclosing. Something revealed, especially a dramatic disclosure of something not previously known or realized."

Anyway, what I realized is that I am where I am supposed to be. After all this time wondering, it just came to me one night right out of the blue.

Honestly. No joking. Just doing some stargazing and enjoying the peace and quiet, when all of a sudden the light went on, and I just knew.

Knew what?

Knew that a higher power was at work, and that things are the way they are supposed to be.

Now I am not saying that things are perfect in my world, because perfection is truly overrated.

With perfection, there is nothing to strive for. Nothing to work towards and look forward to. Not a thing out of place.

Well, we all know that will never be the case, so why do we even
strive for perfection?

Most of us are too hard on ourselves. We try to be perfect, when in fact that is not possible. Well so what! Life is life, with all of its challenges, trials and tribulations.

You do recognize the word tribulation right?

"Great affliction, trial, or distress; suffering.
An experience that tests one's endurance, patience, or faith."

We certainly all have those from time to time. I truly believe that you are where you are, because you are who you are supposed to be.

Maybe the light hasn't gone on for you yet.
Maybe you still wonder why things are this way.
Maybe you want them to be different and wish they would be.

Perhaps it is time to realize your purpose in Life, and start living it! Here's hoping that your light goes on soon.

increasing willpower

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” – Theodore Roosevelt

This quote embodies everything I know about willpower. It displays what we as people are capable of when we are pushed to the nth degree.
While this quote is indeed powerful, most of us still don’t understand how to increase our willpower. Whenever we perceive even a little step in the wrong direction, it becomes the end of world. Such thinking cannot yield good results. Remember that you have to always…

Try, try again

I can not stress this enough. No matter how long it takes and how beaten you may feel, you must try and try again. You’ll never know how much you can handle if you don’t put your limits to the test. How many times does it take for a baby to stand up before he or she finally does? How long do great athletes, actors, writers, composers, first-time mothers and fathers practice before they finally get it right? How much heartache do you have to feel until you finally feel true love? You will never know if you do not try. The very act of trying itself increases your willpower because it instills in your mind that you can do it; that you can succeed.

Eliminate negative influences

Who has not felt the sting or hurt when someone you thought supported you, in fact, actually didn’t? You are not the first one to be criticized. People de-constructively criticize what they do not understand. If you come from a long line of farmers and you have big dreams to be a “hot-shot lawyer”, expect some backlash. If your friends are all planning to work in the same field, but you choose another, I bet you dollars to donuts that at least a few of them will look down on you. Cut them loose if you have to. There is no way a negative influence has ever made a person successful (except in defiance of that said influence). Listen only to constructive criticism that helps you learn and grow as a person.

Seek out those who you resonate with

You may think you have achieved great willpower, but nothing can push it ever higher than surrounding yourself with those who are similar to you. In times of sheer doubt, they can fish you out of your pit of despair. When you achieve the little goals, they will revel with you in your glory. When they are down for the count, it will be your job to push them back up. What you can accomplish alone will be amplified when you put great minds together. To have someone always there to drive you forward makes you feel as if you’ve promised them to endure what lies ahead.

Realize defeat, but never accept it

Those who know defeat are the ones that have the most willpower. After their long line of defeats they will always say, “But the day I was about to quit, I decided to try one more time…”. There will always be days when defeat rears it’s head, but that doesn’t mean you should accept it. Even when it seems as if you are making no headway, stop and think about how far you’ve come. The effort you put in beforehand has made you who you are now. Learn from your defeats, but act immediately afterwards to redeem yourself.
It has been said that confidence cannot be faked; that you must fake it until you make it. This is not the case with willpower. You cannot fake effort or will. All the hardships, all of the constant forward trudging: it’s all real. As long as you keep acting positively, you can be sure to achieve anything you put your mind to.

Give up. Quit. Can’t. These words should not exist in your vocabulary.

new blog site..new life

I am Yanyan

A simple person living a simple life being a single mom to "Kyan". Having him and a family who really cares made me really grateful. I usually spend most of my time with them for they all worth it. I love writing stuffs for myself and exactly that's why I love blogging. This is my way of expressing what I feel, especially when something's bothering me. I am an open-minded person, I don’t shut people out of my life, and I don’t shut myself out from the world. I really like it when people are trying to know me more than what they see. I’ve been through being labeled and nothing hurt much than people treating you as not you, but the label. I don’t want to get in to too much detail with this; past is past.

I am a bit perfectionist, I want things goes through me to be perfect but things really can't be. I gotta admit it! I failed a lot of times and it made me grow stronger, strong enough to stand on my own principles.

I am trying hard to be independent in a way that I can sustain my needs on my own effort, I've been there when I was still 15, geeezz I was too young to be that independent, it happened when I became an SK Chairperson. It really motivated me to become responsible and leader. But the term has ended and my family don't want me to be involved in politics anymore for they don't want to see me fixing issues I never did.

Since the term ended I am facing another trial, I now have my son. It is really hard being a single mom, but I rather be like this than having his dad who is not really responsible anyway I still have my family who never left me.

.........enough enough enough.. more posts soon